Rest in peace, Gram...

My grandma, Norine McKinley Benzenhoefer, died early Saturday morning after a long illness. She followed this blog closely, and when I visited her last week she asked me what my latest posts have been about. This post is for you, Gram!

I grew up five doors down from my grandparents, and their kitchen table was often a destination to stave off summer boredom. When I think of Grandma twenty years ago, I imagine her drinking tea, with a blue Salada label, the kind that has a little fortune on the back. If I was lucky, she might offer me an oatmeal cookie or a Nilla wafer.

My Gram was never what I would call a "touchy-feely" type, in fact I don't remember ever hugging her until after she got sick, although I know that I must have. But she always asked about what I was doing, and better yet, listened to everything I had to say. She told me about her childhood, which I found fascinating, especially after I moved to Bloomfield, where she had grown up. She told me about her father's dogs, and what it was like when her sisters were small, and all about going to Catholic school (we graduated from the same all-girls, Catholic high school system).

Since M and I moved back to Pittsburgh, Grandma periodically called us to see if we needed furniture. I now have my Grandpa's recliner chair in my living room, along with his reading lamp, and a strange set of golf themed high-ball glasses. I often read at night in her original rocking chair, the first one she had with the low back, that she told me, "wasn't so good for rocking babies", something she spent a good many years doing with five children. She made Grandpa get her a new one with a high back, so she could have something to rest her head against. These are treasured possessions for M and I.

My Grandma showed me what I'm going to look like when I'm old, which I realized when she gave me a framed photo of herself, my mother and me on my wedding day, and it was like looking at one person at three ages. I never thought we looked that much alike, but in that photo, the jaw line, and the eyes are what really makes it.

When I was ten or so, my mom and aunts made me put on her wedding dress for their anniversary party. I know for a fact I could never get into that today...she was tiny back then!

Grandma was pretty tech-savvy for her age, and we exchanged a lot of emails over the years. At first, they made me laugh, because she would write in all lower case letters and keep it very short...like a telegraph. But recently, they grew longer. We "swapped prayers" - her idea - when we were closing on our house and she had a big doctor's visit on the same day. She always, always complained about winter weather, and I think heaven for her will look like the sunny days of late May, when it isn't too hot, but there is absolutely no danger of snow.

Grandma taught me to knit and to crochet, and she passed along her old needles to me. Cousins, if you want a knitting lesson, come on over!